Lose the label. What does that mean you ask? Well, I feel that we should not be defined by our clothes or by any sort of outward appearance or what we wear. I decided to write about this because I both love to dress up as a pin-up but I also have my edgy, dark, all black wearing days. Most people would call it goth. But why call it anything at all. I am a human being first and foremost. It should not matter what I wear. What matters is how I treat others and how I treat myself. I am going to quote Maya Angelou: “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” There has never been a truer statement. Why must we judge one another on what we are wearing or a lifestyle we have decided to live. As long as you are not physically hurting anyone, it should not matter.
I have been thinking a lot about this because I have been torn – am a I a pin-up? Am I a goth? Am I a rocker chick? Guess what – WHO CARES. I am a human being first, a woman, with thoughts, and feelings just like everyone else. One of the reasons I was leery in get into pin-up is because I have heard of the hardcore ones who live it 24/7 and if you don’t then you are not a pin-up. Now I am not saying they are all like that but let’s face it; there are some with that mindset. I feel rather sorry for them for being so limited. Who are you to judge? Who am I to judge? Who are they to judge? Can’t we all just get along? Who cares what this person or that person is doing – as long as they are not physically hurting a living being. If I feel like dressing pin-up, I will dress pin-up and if I feel like wearing all black with my “edgy” jewelry then I will dress that way. My clothing does not define me. I am enough, you are enough, I matter, you matter.
And here is something else – what does it even mean: “She isn’t pin-up enough….she isn’t goth enough” Is their a rule book? Absolutely not. Do what makes you happy. Be true to yourself.
I am sure there are goth’s that don’t think someone is a hardcore goth because of this that or the other thing. again – WHO CARES. I keep coming back to that. Stop judging. I am a human being and am not perfect and need to tell myself the same thing. There is enough hate in the world and there needs to be more love and compassion. Walk a mile in someone else’s shoes. It takes courage no matter how you want to dress to actually go out in public and dress the way you want to dress and THAT my friends is the one common denominator we have. So let’s stand together and cheer each other on and support each other. Not look down or judge because one isn’t pin-up enough or goth enough or whatever. Take away the clothes, the make-up, the hair, the jewelry, etc…. and guess what – we are all human beings. Think before you speak and act. Lose the snobbery, it’s unbecoming. I could care less what you look like. If you are a geniune, kind, compassionate, honest, loyal friend – that is what matters most.
I mainly wrote this post because of my own inner struggle – worrying how people would see me or judge me if I wasn’t dressed pin-up or if I was or was not dressed what others deem goth. And a very wise friend said to me:”In short – try not to overthink, just have fun w it. You do not have to “be” anything other than yourself. You are Rita- not Rita “the goth”, “the pinup”, “the whatever” – simply Rita. And simply Rita is always enough.
So my friends, please think before judging, and simply you is always enough. If you have gotten this far. Thanks for reading.
ritalazaruspinup 